Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if people put themselves out there?)
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Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if people p... - 10/6/2008 6:20:08 PM
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Consecrated2God
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I'd like to discuss the definition of gossip, and if it's ever okay. This is a spin-off of a couple of other threads discussing some famous families that have reality shows.
Is it okay to gossip about people who are on TV? Does the fact their lives are public give us permission to make disparaging remarks about them? Do the rules of gossip change if someone is on TV?
I've always felt that if you wouldn't say something in front of someone, you shouldn't say it behind their back. Things are a little different on the internet, as the comments we make are public. Is that behind someone's back or not?
What kind of guidelines should we use in discussing the personal lives of famous people? Does it make any difference if they are Christians are not?
Discuss!
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 6:29:32 PM
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Memaw.
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Gossip is gossip.
Wrong is wrong.
Whether it is the big screen, TV or your next door neighbor, I don't believe it matters.
quote:
What kind of guidelines should we use in discussing the personal lives of famous people? Does it make any difference if they are Christians are not?
One can discuss the personal lives of famous people without gossiping about them (such as, so and so is having a baby).
When it is hearsay and it's being passed on like the "tabloid rags" at the supermarket, then it's gossip.
It doesn't matter whether THEY are Christians or not, it matters that WE are.
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"Freedom is never more than one generation away from extinction.
Every generation has to learn how to protect and defend it, or it's gone
and gone for a long, long time."
Ronald Reagan
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 6:29:45 PM
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Sideways
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It makes no difference if they are Christian.
It does make a difference if they have chosen to place themselves on TV. I think we can discuss what we see on the TV show (and keep it to what we've actually seen), and talk about what we do or not agree with.
For example, I could say "I really don't like the way Mom A handled that situation." That is perfectly acceptable. Now, I wouldn't say "Mom B doesn't do things the way I would do them. I bet she beats her kids when the camera is off." That would be going to far, in my opinion.
I will never meet these people, so it's not like I'm talking behind the backs of someone who is in my church. Besides all of my comments are on a public forum. The Duggars (or whoever) have complete freedom to come here and see whatever I say about them. Let me put it this way. Gossip is harmful, but discussing reality TV brings no harm to the people on that show.
I feel no need to only say positive things about a family that is choosing to turn their own lives into a TV show.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 6:51:43 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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Ok, when I passed on the info. about it being said Michelle weaning early in order to purposely get pregant again, that was probably gossip..because it was only internet hearsay, so I repent of that. Although for the record, right when I said it, I made sure to state it was not fact.
However, when I said that when Jackson got lost, they only SHOWED Jana comforting Jackson, and didn't SHOW Michelle comforting him, that is not gossip, that is exactly what I saw.
If I said, "Those people must be bad parents because they have a buddy system," (which I have never said, although I'm sure I've been interpreted that way), that would be gossip.
When I flat out heard Jim Bob say on the show that they started the buddy system because they couldn't keep track of their children themselves, and I said I didn't think it was the wisest thing to say on national TV, especially when many are already critical of them, that was not gossip. That was hearing something on a PUBLIC show, and then stating my opinion about what was said.
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 10/6/2008 7:11:24 PM >
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Now thank we all our God, with hearts and hands and voices, what wondrous things He's done, in whom the world rejoices.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 7:15:55 PM
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raivyne
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I am blissfully ignorant of 99% of what goes on in the lives of Hollywood actors. The other 1% invades my consciousness when I occasionally listen to the radio. Garbage in (one ear), garbage out (the other).
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 7:26:03 PM
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Consecrated2God
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Whenever I hear people making negative remarks about people (and I'm talking about IRL here) I tend to defend that person. I used to have a real problem with gossip, and I repented of it years ago and asked God to change me in that area. I've not always been spotless in this area, but when I talk with someone I always picture in my mind that that person is listening in on my conversation. It's really helped me to watch what I say about people. Now when the conversation is going on around me I still tend to picture that person listening in, and that's why I come to that person's defense. Being silent would mean I approved of what the others were saying. I do this whether or not I even know the person. I even do this when people are saying negative things about nameless people groups, such as "bad drivers in the city" or "the department of tranportation" or "greedy CEO's".
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 8:16:21 PM
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stellaluna
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1) I don't equate negativity with gossip. I think I also have a different definition of negativity than some people.
2) I can't recall anything I've ever posted here that I wouldn't repeat to anyone I may have mentioned.
Gossip is the difference between the National Enquirer and the Associated Press. One spreads all kinds of stories without regard for the truth or whether anyone is hurt by it. The other takes pains to tell the truth and sometimes has to report things that aren't pleasant.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 9:02:08 PM
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Consecrated2God
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I think something can be true and still be gossip.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 9:56:29 PM
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OneOfHisJewels
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True, and I appreciate the concern you are showing in this thread.
However, I also think that the stars themselves of reality shows should realize they WILL be talked about, and not always in positive light. If they think they are only going to be oohed and awed over and never criticized, then they are very naive.
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Now thank we all our God, with hearts and hands and voices, what wondrous things He's done, in whom the world rejoices.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 9:59:55 PM
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Consecrated2God
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quote:
However, I also think that the stars themselves of reality shows should realize they WILL be talked about, and not always in positive light. If they think they are only going to be oohed and awed over and never criticized, then they are very naive.
I'm sure they realize that it's a reality. I'm not really looking at it from their perspective as much as from ours, though. What is our responsibility? Just because something is going to happen does not mean we need to participate.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/6/2008 10:18:17 PM
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Sideways
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
I think something can be true and still be gossip.
So, you would never say anything negative about anyone? Never discuss your objections to a politician's policy or anything like that? Never discuss your views on someone's parenting policies, when they are choosing to display those policies to the entire world?
Because I agree with Stella, I do not equate negativity with gossip, and if the Duggars asked me (like they really care), I'd say to them what I've said on this forum.
Or should we never discuss at all what we see on TV, the newspapers, etc? I'm not trying to be sarcastic, I'm just trying to understand where you're coming from, Lisa.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 1:03:41 AM
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OneOfHisJewels
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Consecrated2God
quote:
However, I also think that the stars themselves of reality shows should realize they WILL be talked about, and not always in positive light. If they think they are only going to be oohed and awed over and never criticized, then they are very naive.
I'm sure they realize that it's a reality. I'm not really looking at it from their perspective as much as from ours, though. What is our responsibility? Just because something is going to happen does not mean we need to participate.
I guess our responsibility is not to be slanderous, however, I don't think it's wrong to discuss opinions/views about the actual shows. Sometimes I wanted to talk about how I felt about the Duggar shows online, because I don't have anyone IRL really interested (although I've bored various friends and family with the subject anyway-and not all negative, either..both positive and negative)..my mom thinks it is the most boring subject in the world and sees no reason for my interest whatsoever. She doesn't think they are particularly good or bad, she is just not interested.
< Message edited by OneOfHisJewels -- 10/7/2008 1:28:42 AM >
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Now thank we all our God, with hearts and hands and voices, what wondrous things He's done, in whom the world rejoices.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 8:18:53 AM
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Consecrated2God
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quote:
So, you would never say anything negative about anyone? Never discuss your objections to a politician's policy or anything like that? Never discuss your views on someone's parenting policies, when they are choosing to display those policies to the entire world?
Here's an example of what I personally feel gossip and slander is. Let me talk about Obama for a minute. I disagree with just about everything he stands for. I will point to some of the bills he has signed, such as voting against the Born Alive Protection Act, which would require that babies surviving abortions get medical care. This is true, and not gossip. It's also not slander. There is a reason I am telling people this--it's important to know what kind of legislation he supports, since he's running for public office.
Now, I've seen some of his opponents take it a step further. They talk about how Barak Obama contemplates the destruction of his children and grandchildren, and how he relishes ripping children limb from limb. That crosses the line for me--you have moved from facts to attacking someone's motives and character.
Then there's the plain old untrue gossip that I object to, and I'll correct people who say that, even though I'm strongly opposed to him as a candidate. I've corrected people at church who have told me, "Did you know Obama is secretly Muslim?" and I've corrected family members who have passed around "news" that he is a terrorist. There's no call to go beyond what is true.
I heard somewhere of an acronym to remember how to define gossip, but unfortunatly I can't remember it.  (Isn't that the way it always goes?) I know the first part was we do not pass along information unless it's true. That should be a no-brainer. But there's more than that.
One of them was, "Is it kind?" As Christians, we are to be kind to one another. Passing along unkind things about someone else, even if they are true, isn't something we are called to do. The Bible says that love covers a multitude of sins. I once posted about issues in my own family and felt convicted of it, even though it was all true. I had no business airing their dirty laundry for them and it was disrespectful and wrong of me to do so.
Sometimes we do need to pass along information about someone else, but then the question is "Is it necessary?" ("Is it helpful?" may have also been in the acronym.) Why are we passing it along? In the case of Obama, it's important to know what policies he supports. In other cases, it may be for the protection of someone (i.e. "be careful--this girl tends to steal things. I'd lock up my purse if I were you.") Or it could be for the help of person you are talking about, such as getting help for a loved one with an addiction.
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<--Plantation house in Louisiana
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 9:40:33 AM
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SonInMe1
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Lets take Oprah...
to talk about her relationship with her boyfriend would be wrong....
to talk about her relationship with her boyfriend as she promotes it as being moral...is right.
to talk about her religion would be wrong...
to talk about the religion she has started that perverts the word, is right.
In other words if you put your views out there for public consumption..esspecially for profit....then you get what you get.
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You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.
James 4:4
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 1:38:42 PM
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stampinlady
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Lisa, I agree with your post. Stating the FACTS is one thing, exagerating them is another. Someone the otherday reminded me that somtimes these bills have other things attached to them and can me the reason why they get vetoed. I think some are also quick to use the word "terrorist" as a scare tactic and that's wrong, imo. Mentioning Obama's middle name scares some folks too, but does any remember that Barak lead Isreal with Deborah!!! (not indorsing anyone here just read that chaper in Judges the other day). The average person really has to do alot of homework to find the truth these days.
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 4:50:09 PM
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KatMack
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I think a lot of comes down to motive also. We need to ask ourselves WHY were saying or sharing what we are. I can share why I disagree with something a person on a reality show does in order to educate others about why I feel the way I do or I can share in order to make myself feel better about my choices.
Does that make sense? It's late in the day and it makes perfect sense in my head, but that doesn't always translate to the keyboard!
--Kat
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"God will do what God will do. What I'm responsible for is to believe he's all he says he is and obey what he tells me to do. " -magdaleine
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RE: Celebrity Gossip: (Is it always wrong, even if peop... - 10/7/2008 6:11:15 PM
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Consecrated2God
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Yes, that makes a lot of sense, Kat. We should always ask ourselves why we are saying something, and check our hearts to see if our motives are correct.
Recently I made a remark about Joe Biden that I shouldn't have made. My motive was actually to get back at the people who are so snide towards Senator Palin. It was a tit-for-tat, see-how-you-like-it type of thing to say. I doubt it hurt Senator Biden. He probably never saw it and even if he did, I'm sure he's seen everything. But my motives weren't pure in posting that.
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Christine 
. I don't agree with your statement of "only say that which is edifying" regarding a celebrity or reality TV show. Or can something be edifying but still negative? Maybe I misread you on that one. 
