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an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 1:05:46 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Hi She Sayers,
Having hurdled over the challenges of communicating with each other, and answering machines, voicemail, gabled text messages, ... you learn I was calling to ask if you'd like to have supper with me, and I'd invited a couple we both know to join us for some great food and laughs.
This is starting to be less of a problem with dining out, but we go out to Cafe de La Huge Portions, where the men and the tomboys do not have as much problem putting away all the food as the attractive, health-conscious, She Sayer (who always declines the thought of a $6.00 desert- smart woman!- she's closer to getting that next pair of shoes.)
Our couple friend, he pays for the meal, and you and I have already agreed to buy our own. We are headed for the poor, decrepit old Putt-Putt mini-golf course afterwards.
So, you've eaten all you care to, and you've still got a 3rd of what you ordered on your plate (one of your favorite entrees- though I couldn't possibly know this yet). Jack and Jill (she's a tomboy) and I have nothing left to eat, and none of us are eyeing your plate, which is fine because you don't share at the table in public, anyways.
Do you:
A- ask for a carry-out box? or
B- decide to just leave it.
What a silly question, right? Yeah, I know. I'm not one to challenge someone on that, or ask if I could take that home for my own dog, or talk to you about starving children somewhere. And you haven't played with your food and made a mess of the rest of it... smiling remembering college cafeteria tray track returns to the dishwasher. Some more beautiful food sculptures have never been seen since. The cereal would run out on those evenings the meal totally Bombed on.
It's easy for you to see you could turn that remainder into a lunch at work the next day... with an apple and a cookie on the side. At the same time, this is the first time out with me for a meal (and probably the last time Jack & Jill get invited. They hogged all the conversation, were total flirts with each other, sharing food- and then there was the belching contest!). We kept swapping looks at each other- not believing we knew these people.
Don(e) appetite!
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 1:51:29 AM
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amyminchin
Posts: 22
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I always get a take away container from the waiters so I can have my left overs for lunch the next day. Why waste wondeful food?
It's just stupid- I mean seriously, you pay for it- why waste it?
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"A compliment is like a kiss through a veil" -Victor Hugo
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 2:37:45 AM
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solo_soprano22
Posts: 2478
Joined: 4/27/2005
From: I'm a Southern girl
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It depends. Sometimes I leave it; sometimes I take it. But, if I'm doing something after dinner, I might not want it sitting in a car like that. I know how fast things can grow in moderately warm places...so, I might take it and not eat it, or just leave it if I can't refrigerate it soon.
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For God, For Learning, Forever.
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 7:48:43 AM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 2097
Joined: 12/11/2007
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I normally offer it to the people I'm with, and if they don't want it, I have it wrapped for the next day.
Solo, if there's a lot of homeless people where you are, and you can't make it home to refrigerate your left overs, you can always drop them off to people on the street. THey'd appreciate it. Of course, the difficult part now it making sure that no one gets sick and you end up being sued. It's always a possibility.
_____________________________
The heavens declare the glory of God;
And the firmament shows His handiwork. Psalm 19: 1
____________________________________
To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven. King Solomon
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 10:08:00 AM
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moon_mouse
Posts: 378
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Since we're going out somewhere afterwards, I wouldn't take it with me. I'm a big stickler for food safety. But, if dinner were the last event of the evening, I'd certainly take it with me.
BTW, I'm attractive and health conscious, but when I go out to a restaurant, I have NO problem putting away a hearty meal. I live by the 80-20 rule. If 80% of what I eat is healthy, I don't worry about the other 20%. So no "ladies platter" for me. Send that enchilada sampler platter my way! And yes please, I'll have some fried ice cream, too! (I don't really care about shoes, either.  )
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 4:34:16 PM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
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Very interesting, but not all it can be, and that is my fault. Begging forgiveness for those of you thinking you were done with this one, I've got this opportunity here...
It just so happened that I knew about this cafe, but somehow you did not. So in my thinking about tonight, I did happen to throw some freezer packs and towels in a small ice chest, and into the trunk. And you thought that strange knocking sound was my car.
So, I spied your indecision about your plate, and inbetween loud belches and hysterical laughter of Jack & Jill you wonder what I'm thinking, because our chuckling in empathy at the cuteness of it all ended 2 minutes after they started.
(I can't believe you, mano! This was not even pizza and beer night (root or real) with the guys! You are really bringing me down and I'm going to have to humble you on the golf tourney...)
With all that going on, I mention the ice chest in my trunk. That should open this up a little bit more as to what you want to do with your food.
Also, what thoughts do you have about how to surpress Jack & Jill's unexpected behavior? I'm rather irate because I thought I might get to know you better over the course of the meal, but I'm clueless as to how to encourage a friend to CHILL OUT! This is not for just before leaving, but 2 minutes and 1 second into their non-typical behavior. Would it be possible to eyeball a suggestion to you that the ladies visit the restroom for a minute? (Looking at you, then Jill, then the restroom sign, and repeat, or lip-speak restroom? Or do you know of some great conversation topics for this... ones that you are always tired of being the one to try to get going in a group setting to calm down a group? Perhaps I suggest both of us visit the restrooms somehow, where we can, like, talk and hang out and enjoy the time together away from too much PDofA. But that will not calm them down. Not tonight.
This is not our friends out to ruin this evening... neither of us have a clue what's going on.
Two things...
your uneaten food
friends unexpected behavior
Thanks for your graciousness in accepting this addition to what you may have already said.
OneJohn410
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/3/2008 5:17:14 PM
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solo_soprano22
Posts: 2478
Joined: 4/27/2005
From: I'm a Southern girl
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Are you asking how to get Jack and Jill to chill out? I don't typically put up with belching contests in cafes/restaurants, so I would have politely asked them to calm down, or we could have gone off by ourselves. About the food, it's up to her. I'm not sure that I'd take it even with an ice chest, but that's just ME. I'd make it a point not to go out with Jack and Jill again though-- not in that kind of setting.
_____________________________
For God, For Learning, Forever.
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/4/2008 7:19:54 AM
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ebony101
Posts: 893
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From: the big blue marble
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I am taking my food with me, whether you have an ice chest in your car or not. It's paid for and this is not an all you can eat where you can't take the food with you  . So I would kindly ask the waiter/waitress "to package this to go" with a smile that he/she can't refuse.
As for that unthinkable behaviour from Jack and Jill. I'd make a mental note not to go anywhere with them again. I would suggest to you that you publicly announce on our behalf: "After all that food, I don't think we can make it to the golf course! You two, can go ahead if you want to, we're gonna hit the sack (not together of course), got plans tomorrow." That performs the following functions:
1. gets us away from them;
2. gives them the privacy they undoubtedly want, &
3. gives us some leeway to get some get to know you time, we can go to the park or the movies.
NO, I would not accept any hints, from you, that I take Jill to the ladies room to tell her to chill out and cool down with her man.
_____________________________
'We're writing a gospel, a chapter each day,
By the things that we do & the words that we say.'
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/4/2008 5:26:22 PM
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stimulus
Posts: 180
Joined: 6/4/2005
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quote:
your uneaten food
The fact that you brought a cooler with ice packs wouldn't make me feel like I had to take leftover food that *I* paid for. I would take it if I wanted to, but there are a lot of restaurant dishes that do not warm up well. Too often, I take it home and throw it away two days later. Now, if you had paid for it and brought a cooler to make sure leftovers didn't go to waste, I would at least make you feel good and take it home.
quote:
friends unexpected behavior
You invited them, so I very likely would blame you in part for their behavior. I certainly wouldn't take your hint to take the girl aside and talk to her. I would be annoyed with you if you didn't stop him from carrying on.
All together, if you let your friends ruin the evening and tried to guilt trip me into taking leftover food home... I'm not sure you would get a second date.
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/4/2008 6:15:46 PM
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Focusing
Posts: 5963
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This is a first date ...
re the food: if it was good and you told me you had the ice packs, I'd take it with me (although I would hope you would have mentioned the outrageous portions ahead of time). I remember a restaurant known for their portions ... I got 4 meals out of the one I ordered! I haven't been back there. They should have had a sign that said "Order one meal for your family of four" LOL
Many years ago I had gone out on a first date, and even though I declined a to-go box, my date insisted, telling me not to waste the food. I don't like salty food, and the food was extremely salty, and we were going out to a movie afterwards. I had to wait until I got home to throw the box away. I was not impressed at his insistence, and never went out with him again.
re Jack & Jill: well, people will be people, rude or not. Since I already know them, I would know it wasn't your fault and wouldn't blame you for their behavior. However, it would be quite nice of you to suggest to Jack & Jill that we part ways after dinner so the two of us could have some quiet time together.
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There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/4/2008 6:57:07 PM
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Prairiehiker
Posts: 2097
Joined: 12/11/2007
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Hey, OneJohn, regarding Jack and Jill, if I was in your position, meaning, I agreed to be out with a couple of friends, and I happen to bring a date, I would most likely try to tell the couple to try to tone it down a bit because I want to have a decent conversation with my date. If they insist on their behaviour, of if they are too drunk to know any different, the, I'd suggest that we part ways for the night. I'm known to be very straight forward with people, but I do it with charm so I can always get away with it, lol.
Regarding the food, hey, if this is such a big deal for you, then, it's best that you observe her in her natural state. If leaving the food on her plate is a turn off, then, offer a suggestion, and she accepts, then good. Shows how open minded she is about other's ideas. If not, then, let her be. Just deduct some brownie points from her. LOL. You're just getting to know her, right. So, get to know her until you know enough to pursue, or not.
_____________________________
The heavens declare the glory of God;
And the firmament shows His handiwork. Psalm 19: 1
____________________________________
To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven. King Solomon
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/5/2008 8:40:58 PM
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WhiteRoseBlessings
Posts: 26127
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re: Inappropriate behavior from other couple
I absolutely would not take a grown woman to the ladies' room to have a talk with her. To me, that is something that adults do with children; and if I'm on a date, I am not playing the role of anyone's babysitter.
Neither would I tell a grown person how to behave in that particular situation. The only time I would voice such things is if the person is behaving inappropriately towards me.
However, I would do one of two things (depending on how out-of-control the couple was behaving):
(a) Suggest an end to the meal and wish the couple an enjoyable night, politely letting them know that this was no longer a double-date.
(b) Express my thanks to you for the evening, bid my adieus and call it a night and then I would either walk home, take public transporation or call a taxi. If you wanted to take me home, that would be fine, also; but either way, the date would very most likely be over; because frankly, if the couple was as boorish as you've describe, I would probably prefer to spend the remainder of the evening by myself.
I would also make a mental note to not accept future invitations involving that couple.
re: Leftover food
While very considerate for a man to bring an ice chest, I may or may not take him up on the offer. And that's really all it should be: an offer; not a mandate.
If I enjoyed the food, I would probably ask for a to-go container.
If I didn't enjoy the food, I would offer it first to you (and if you declined, then to the couple - if we're still with them). If no one wanted the food, I would leave it at the restaurant.
However, if I picked at the food and didn't really eat it, that would probably indicate that I didn't like it, or that I had questions as to how it was prepared. For example, there are many things that are not healthy for me to eat; but that are considered to be ok to eaten by other people.
My answers regarding leftover food would apply regardless of who paid for it.
If I don't like, want or normally eat what's on my plate, please don't force the issue.
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/5/2008 11:39:35 PM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
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Hi Solo,
Your first quote was about the food, and the second about the couple with us.
My hunch is you leave the food, because you had your fill, and you won't want to eat one of your favorite foods again so soon. Also, since we'd talked mini-golf, the food stays on the table. Note that I didn't have a problem with that, btw.
Jack and Jill are our enigma. We both know both of them, and we haven't seen this kind of behavior- ever. We've known each other as friends, and this is a disappointing first date so far.
So we are looking at each other in disbelief as to their behavior- we even sniff their drinks to see if someone enhanced them. Since its a great mystery, it sounds like it is my call, and you are ready for me to make it, probably well before two minutes into it. See, I'm thinking they are really trying to give us a hard time for some cruel type of fun.
That's how I'd approach it. Ask them what's going on here, that they are embarrassing themselves, our taste in friends, and would they stop. If not, we pick up our plates and relocate, letting a waitperson know the table has split. They've got a lot of 'splainin' to do no matter what, and I don't think we'll go to mini-golf with them, aye-ther! 
Thanks for your posts!
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: solo_soprano22
It depends. Sometimes I leave it; sometimes I take it. But, if I'm doing something after dinner, I might not want it sitting in a car like that. I know how fast things can grow in moderately warm places...so, I might take it and not eat it, or just leave it if I can't refrigerate it soon.
quote:
Are you asking how to get Jack and Jill to chill out? I don't typically put up with belching contests in cafes/restaurants, so I would have politely asked them to calm down, or we could have gone off by ourselves. About the food, it's up to her. I'm not sure that I'd take it even with an ice chest, but that's just ME. I'd make it a point not to go out with Jack and Jill again though-- not in that kind of setting.
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/5/2008 11:44:53 PM
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WhiteRoseBlessings
Posts: 26127
Joined: 4/11/2005
From: Here, but subject to change . . . stay tuned!
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BTW, Carl . . . is this a hypothetical situation, or did this really happen to you recently?
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 12:05:40 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Hey Prariehiker,
We are in a first date setting, and we both know Jack and Jill. We've never seen them this wired. As we stare incredulously at each other at their behavior, I'm wanting the date to not be blown, so at that precise moment, two minutes one second into surprise belch-a-thon, I'm about to drag them both out to the pond by the restaurant and see if they can stir up some company on the lilly pads. (That's not my style, but I can not believe how everyone's staring at us like we are from anonter planet). So, I'll first ask them to stop it immediately, and if they keep up then we'll move to another table.
The food thing was probably just to ask a silly question. It's not a big deal to me. It appears you liked yours, and just had no idea that much non-camping type food could come out on a plate. See, even if we sit through the belching contest while people are throwing food at us and telling them to stop... I'm saying I think I could notice your indecision about food you are not paying for. That I realized we'd be out for awhile afterward and have a cooler for it... if you want it. This is not somebody else's plate... you ate 2/3rds of the food off it. So I'll wager this yere smiley  that you ask our waitperson getting hit with food for a carry-out box. At this point, the four of us rebel and start hurling the food back at people, and we'll never be allowed in there again. I kind of liked the place, too.
So all you have to do is chip in your smiley and tell me who wins.
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: Prairiehiker
Hey, OneJohn, regarding Jack and Jill, if I was in your position, meaning, I agreed to be out with a couple of friends, and I happen to bring a date, I would most likely try to tell the couple to try to tone it down a bit because I want to have a decent conversation with my date. If they insist on their behaviour, of if they are too drunk to know any different, the, I'd suggest that we part ways for the night. I'm known to be very straight forward with people, but I do it with charm so I can always get away with it, lol.
Regarding the food, hey, if this is such a big deal for you, then, it's best that you observe her in her natural state. If leaving the food on her plate is a turn off, then, offer a suggestion, and she accepts, then good. Shows how open minded she is about other's ideas. If not, then, let her be. Just deduct some brownie points from her. LOL. You're just getting to know her, right. So, get to know her until you know enough to pursue, or not.
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 12:10:36 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Hey Moon_mouse,
I love it that you are in on this post. Would you please send me some more of this? Some questions arose, and there were just a few details added to the situation since you posted. I'll do a better reply soon if there's nothing more you wish to add.
Thanks!
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: moon_mouse
Since we're going out somewhere afterwards, I wouldn't take it with me. I'm a big stickler for food safety. But, if dinner were the last event of the evening, I'd certainly take it with me.
BTW, I'm attractive and health conscious, but when I go out to a restaurant, I have NO problem putting away a hearty meal. I live by the 80-20 rule. If 80% of what I eat is healthy, I don't worry about the other 20%. So no "ladies platter" for me. Send that enchilada sampler platter my way! And yes please, I'll have some fried ice cream, too! (I don't really care about shoes, either. )
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 12:22:10 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
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Ebony! Hey, and thanks for your post!
[Opening my trunk, your to-go goes in the ice chest, all wrapped up for to keep chilled the rest of the night. Trying to remember if we passed an ice station on the way here... we could put Jack and Jill on ice in the trunk for the rest of the evening too... only they drove separately.]
Bless their hearts, our friends really tried to stop, but they couldn't, and we moved to another table for the rest of the meal. They were escorted to the register, where they belched all through paying for their food right there on the spot, and then out the door. It surprised me, but they ceased to be of any concern to us.
Thank you for your suggestions about anouncing the company was going to split for the evening before golf. I never did like putting around frogs and toads drawn to a friend for mimicing a TV commercial.
Blessings,
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: ebony101
I am taking my food with me, whether you have an ice chest in your car or not. It's paid for and this is not an all you can eat where you can't take the food with you . So I would kindly ask the waiter/waitress "to package this to go" with a smile that he/she can't refuse.
As for that unthinkable behaviour from Jack and Jill. I'd make a mental note not to go anywhere with them again. I would suggest to you that you publicly announce on our behalf: "After all that food, I don't think we can make it to the golf course! You two, can go ahead if you want to, we're gonna hit the sack (not together of course), got plans tomorrow." That performs the following functions:
1. gets us away from them;
2. gives them the privacy they undoubtedly want, &
3. gives us some leeway to get some get to know you time, we can go to the park or the movies.
NO, I would not accept any hints, from you, that I take Jill to the ladies room to tell her to chill out and cool down with her man.
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 12:37:47 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Hey Stimulus,
This is too huge a post, but I'm learning, so thanks for your reply.
You are right, we went dutch on the meal. And you've heard me apologize for not saying these folks can fill you up and then some. Also, that's I've got a cooler in the trunk, that you thought the noises were of my transmission. I don't have anything more to add on this. If you like, you can share what you did with it. It was good... you ate 2/3rds of it, and it happens to be one of your favorite foods.
I did invite them, and we both know Jack and Jill. Tonight, they really fell off the sharp precipice of that proverbial hill in my book. I would not being held accountable for two other individuals behavior. I'm of the opine that I could read that from your face well before two minutes, and actions would be taken to get us away from them.
So there's no guilt trip about the food, and Jack & Jill had to leave the restaurant before we did. We got out the parkinglot, found a note on my windshield that they were Verry Sorry, and we thoroughly agreed with them. They were not around, I wanted to try to rescue things and just get you back home... did we forget your carry-out box in there or not?
Thanks!
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: stimulus
quote:
your uneaten food
The fact that you brought a cooler with ice packs wouldn't make me feel like I had to take leftover food that *I* paid for. I would take it if I wanted to, but there are a lot of restaurant dishes that do not warm up well. Too often, I take it home and throw it away two days later. Now, if you had paid for it and brought a cooler to make sure leftovers didn't go to waste, I would at least make you feel good and take it home.
quote:
friends unexpected behavior
You invited them, so I very likely would blame you in part for their behavior. I certainly wouldn't take your hint to take the girl aside and talk to her. I would be annoyed with you if you didn't stop him from carrying on.
All together, if you let your friends ruin the evening and tried to guilt trip me into taking leftover food home... I'm not sure you would get a second date.
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 12:56:11 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
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Hi Focusing!
I would give you a gold star for that first phrase there, but there are no star-shaped smileys.
*gold star*
I don't know if it ws a good recipe for one of your favorite entrees you like to order.  It appears to me that it was, as you ate 2/3rds of it. In fact, I'm hoping to return some time, but I hate that I didn't mention how outrageous the portions were. I should have just mentioned the name of the place once more in my call to you- which somehow I actually found someone home!
Jack & Jill were escorted to the register and the exit before we left. A tear-stained note on my windshield read Sorry! J&J, and they were gone. So no golfing, but the fancy decafs we got at the books-a-ten-thousand and some discussion about devotional books we ended up getting was a good reprieve.
Thanks for the 'unexpected' evening!
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: Focusing
This is a first date ...
re the food: if it was good and you told me you had the ice packs, I'd take it with me (although I would hope you would have mentioned the outrageous portions ahead of time). I remember a restaurant known for their portions ... I got 4 meals out of the one I ordered! I haven't been back there. They should have had a sign that said "Order one meal for your family of four" LOL
Many years ago I had gone out on a first date, and even though I declined a to-go box, my date insisted, telling me not to waste the food. I don't like salty food, and the food was extremely salty, and we were going out to a movie afterwards. I had to wait until I got home to throw the box away. I was not impressed at his insistence, and never went out with him again.
re Jack & Jill: well, people will be people, rude or not. Since I already know them, I would know it wasn't your fault and wouldn't blame you for their behavior. However, it would be quite nice of you to suggest to Jack & Jill that we part ways after dinner so the two of us could have some quiet time together.
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Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 1:17:30 AM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
Status: offline
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WRB,
Thanks for your reply!
I've come to a consensus with my thinking in making up this obnoxious setting these four are in, which is for me, having been the host, to ask for a cease and desist, and if that failed, for you and I to find another table and let the waitperson know the party parted. As things turned out, they were escorted to the register, and then the door. They were not in the parking lot when we left, though there was a note of apology on my windshield. They were nowhere to be seen, and golf was cancelled. We found some decaf coffee in a bookstore, browsed around, talked briefly, and you were home.
With your food, the meal was dutch. It appeared you enjoyed it as you ate 2/3rds of it. When I heard you place your order with special cooking instructions, I realized you had some food sensitivities. I know people with the peanut allergy, where reactions can be life-threatening. So on seeing your contemplation of what to do, and how the evening had gone, I just remained silent. If you took it, it was in the ice chest. No pressures.
Thanks again for your participation
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: WhiteRoseBlessings
re: Inappropriate behavior from other couple
I absolutely would not take a grown woman to the ladies' room to have a talk with her. To me, that is something that adults do with children; and if I'm on a date, I am not playing the role of anyone's babysitter.
Neither would I tell a grown person how to behave in that particular situation. The only time I would voice such things is if the person is behaving inappropriately towards me.
However, I would do one of two things (depending on how out-of-control the couple was behaving):
(a) Suggest an end to the meal and wish the couple an enjoyable night, politely letting them know that this was no longer a double-date.
(b) Express my thanks to you for the evening, bid my adieus and call it a night and then I would either walk home, take public transporation or call a taxi. If you wanted to take me home, that would be fine, also; but either way, the date would very most likely be over; because frankly, if the couple was as boorish as you've describe, I would probably prefer to spend the remainder of the evening by myself.
I would also make a mental note to not accept future invitations involving that couple.
re: Leftover food
While very considerate for a man to bring an ice chest, I may or may not take him up on the offer. And that's really all it should be: an offer; not a mandate.
If I enjoyed the food, I would probably ask for a to-go container.
If I didn't enjoy the food, I would offer it first to you (and if you declined, then to the couple - if we're still with them). If no one wanted the food, I would leave it at the restaurant.
However, if I picked at the food and didn't really eat it, that would probably indicate that I didn't like it, or that I had questions as to how it was prepared. For example, there are many things that are not healthy for me to eat; but that are considered to be ok to eaten by other people.
My answers regarding leftover food would apply regardless of who paid for it.
If I don't like, want or normally eat what's on my plate, please don't force the issue.
_____________________________
Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago. Ephesians 2:9-10
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 6:39:32 AM
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losgan
Posts: 714
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Austin-Garland, Texas
Status: offline
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I'm all about leftovers - and I make no excuses about why I'm asking for them, what I plan to do with them. Perhaps it is just more common here - but they often will ask if you'd like a box before you ask them when they notice the quantity left on your plate.
And I must say - I've been pleased with my recent date's decision to do the same. :)
As far as the other couple's behavior - well, I don't find belching to be deplorably inappropriate. Annoying - yes. And were it my date carrying on like that and egging me to join in - it could very well be the last date. But I think in my case my date and myself would exchange raised eyebrows and that would be about that. I'd definitely be discerning about where I'd agree to go with this other couple in the future though!
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 2:30:07 PM
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moon_mouse
Posts: 378
Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: OneJohn410
Some questions arose, and there were just a few details added to the situation since you posted. I'll do a better reply soon if there's nothing more you wish to add.
Sorry for the delay. I had a rather crazy weekend, and just now got back online.
You wouldn't have had to signal me to take Jill out and speak with her. I'd have been way ahead of that. I'd have already said (to the both of them, at the table) ,"excuse me, but I think we're disturbing the other patrons. Let's try to keep it down a bit." If they reacted poorly, I wouldn't have blamed you, and would be open to another date, as long as they weren't along.
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RE: an evening out... the restaurant - 10/6/2008 6:37:13 PM
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OneJohn410
Posts: 1162
Joined: 6/1/2008
Status: offline
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Hi Losgan,
I'm glad you snuck in just before this post comes to a close. I'm going to try this again sometime, but no belching other couple.
Well, there was no mini-golf as there was no Jerk & Jallo when we left the Cafe de la Huge Portions, so when you agreed to some decaf coffee at the Books-a-ten-thousand, your to-go went in my noisy little cooler in the trunk. I haven't heard back (nor have I asked) if they think the evening might have been rescued and I have another opportunity to go out with you or not. It's great to hear your date also carries a noisy ice chest in his trunk. That keeps the fictitious me from being the only one.
I'm thrilled to hear that if I joined in with Jack & Jill in belching, that it sounds like you would refuse the peer pressure! It was very annoying, and they wouldn't stop. We relocated, they were relocated, and when we exited, they were nowhere to be seen. If you like book wholesellers, I may have rescued the evening with a cup of decaf java and some small discussion at the Books-A-Ten-thousand. Their coffee isn't as good as Hockeypucks, but it's pretty good. The hockey moms rave over it. I agree that Jack & Jill fell off the cliff in my book that evening.
Thanks for participating,
OneJohn410
quote:
ORIGINAL: losgan
I'm all about leftovers - and I make no excuses about why I'm asking for them, what I plan to do with them. Perhaps it is just more common here - but they often will ask if you'd like a box before you ask them when they notice the quantity left on your plate.
And I must say - I've been pleased with my recent date's decision to do the same. :)
As far as the other couple's behavior - well, I don't find belching to be deplorably inappropriate. Annoying - yes. And were it my date carrying on like that and egging me to join in - it could very well be the last date. But I think in my case my date | | |
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